Amnesty international may investigate goings on at Manchester United!!

One of the funniest articles which I've read for some time!

From the ManUtd.com forum:

"Following recent reports of slavery at Manchester United, it is has been hoped that amnesty international will perform a full enquiry of these accusations. The working conditions at old trafford in particular are thought to worry amnesty, shocking revelations may include:

* last season players forced to lift heavy objects above head height (namely trophies) on many occasions; Amnesty have announced that the same claim was levelled at Liverpoo football club, but was found to be entirely untrue and a reprensentative from Liverpoo said " Its been so long since we won any trophies i doubt we'd know what to do with them". Some players may transfer to spanish clubs to free themselves from this problem.

*wages being paid in £50 notes instead of £20 notes. in one case a player only earning £120,000 a week, was forced to push for a rise to £150,000 per week so that he can still have his weekly swim in his money. The same player may seek a transfer as he considers Euros much bulkier and easier to swin in.

*Signing a contract and having to stick to it.

* The pitch at Old Trafford being particularly uncomfortable. One player who spends a lot of his time lying on the pitch has resorted to banging the ground in order to soften it up or crying, both of which he is very good at.

* In one extreme case a player was forced to listen to over 75,000 people sing his name over a period of 9 months!!!! He appealed to be allowed to wear ear protectors, but his requests were denied, the player now feels that his only option is to move to Real Madrid where they wave white hankerchiefs to show their support!!



These shocking revalations need to be investigated!! if any manchester united fan reading this would like me to relay any shocking reports that they have heard about the goings on at Old Trafford or would like to comment on the ongoing travesty please reply



Breaking News

A local university has declared it may change the name of its student union hall from the mandela hall to the cristianoronaldo hall, a statement said " Nelson was a symbol for freedom for a generation, now we hope that Ronaldo is granted his freedom as well from the great oppression that has befallen him" the students has confirmed that the freecristianoronaldo marches will begin in freshers week next year and that the proclaimers have been approached to sing the "FREE CRISTIANORONALDO" song.







Hopefully this can bring a smile to peoples faces, we haven't had much to smile about, its all a bit of fun so i hope the mods leave it up for while or even contribute, thanks"